HOUSES AND LIVING SPACES may symbolize a dreamer’s state of mind — the place s/he lives mentally. Today’s dream of a beautiful house with a shocking secret room presents a clear example of this interpretation.

Dear Carolyn,

My wife and I had a nasty divorce after 23 years of marriage. I have been single and on my own for more than eight years now. I have dated a bit here and there. And I have had some interest in continuing a relationship since then, but nothing ever “takes.” It’s been long enough now that I think I’d like to settle down again and have someone I can look to the future with. But somehow, someway, no matter how good things seem to be with this woman or that one, I can’t bring myself to get married again. Now, two perfectly good women are lost to me and I know something has to change.

During these years, I have had the same dream more than once: I am walking up to a beautiful mansion. The grounds are well-manicured and the interior is lovely. I begin wandering through the rooms and the hallways, finding one charming area after another. Then, on my left is a door with a polished plaque marked “Marriage.” When I open the door, I am horrified to see stacks of dead bodies!

I know I have to carry them out of there because of the health concerns, but instead, I decide I’ll do it later. I back out of the room, close the door and leave the house.

Signed, Single Too Long

Dear Single,

It must be clear to you already that the bodies in the room marked “Marriage” represent the dead but not buried resentments, accusations and residual anger from your nasty divorce. There they are, stacked up and festering in what is otherwise a beautiful state of mind. No doubt, such a collection of antipathies will work against your stated desire to remarry and spend the remainder of your time in a committed relationship.

The good news is that you acknowledge you must carry that stored bitterness out of the house, as your Dreaming Self states, “because of health concerns.” It is unhealthy to harbor such bile, Dear Dreamer! You have put off this task, as mirrored by the decision in your dream to take care of it later, to back out of relationships that are beautiful in many aspects.

A starting place might be to work with your dream in your waking state. Consider taking some quiet time to close your eyes and visualize how you can dispose of those bodies and release those animosities. You might take them out in wheelbarrows, or burn them in a fireplace. You could imagine their transformation into mice that scurry away.

The idea is to begin the process of looking your past in its ugly face, recognizing it as separate from your present life and dismissing it, body by body, until it hampers your future happiness no more.

Sweet Dreams to you!

Carolyn Plath, M.Ed., is a Benicia resident and member of the International Association for the Study of Dreams. Reach her at sendmeyourdreams@yahoo.com.

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