What happens when we give an umbrella a voice?
I am not just an ordinary umbrella. I was purchased on the first day of Megan and Ellen’s tour of Italy. I was being jostled around by my vendor on a rainy day in Lake Como. Looking my very best brown and beige self, I was overlooked in favor of a maroon and beige competitor. I was projecting protection from the inclement weather when Megan noticed me. However, she had already purchased my maroon cousin. She found herself in a dilemma when my owner would not trade my eight Euro relative for me. I never expected Ellen to come to the rescue. She bought me and traded Megan for the maroon colored variety. And so my journey began.
Being the non-collapsible variety, I have the shape of a cane with my spines protruding. I am rather substantial and if I do say so myself I am a bargain at E8. Probably the pricing is due to the fact that my owner, not my vendor, has a warehouse full. In that it rains a lot in Northern Italy, business is brisk. I was quite a find at the price if I do say so myself.
And so the tour of Italy began in rainy Milan and Lake Como. On checking out of the hotel at Lake Como, Ellen could not find my maroon cousin anywhere in the room. As is often the case, she explains her losses by blaming some other force. In this case, she was sure someone stole the E8 wonder. I was curious as to why anyone would steal an unwieldly inexpensive umbrella when the supply in town was unlimited. Vendors were all over Lake Como and Milan.
From Lake Como, I travelled to Milan, to Venice, Florence, the Amalfi Coast, San Geminagno, Pompeii, Rome, Santa Margherita Legare, and Munich and then to our final destination, San Francisco.
When in San Geminagno, I overheard Megan and Ellen discussing the torrential rain during the thunder storm in the Tuscan hill town. Where was I? I was in the hotel room still in my plastic wrap. Was I never to see any action on this trip? I was feeling particularly useless at this point. Was I just a pretty face (adornment)? Was I seen as a symbol of an Italian bargain? I fell into a slump.
I never expected the action that took place when we were leaving Santa Margarita Legare. You need to understand that I was jerked around on buses for two weeks. I was shoved into the overhead compartment often being wedged in between suitcases and backpacks. It was a wonder that my spines were not bent. But I have to admit that I was well cared for with my plastic sheath still intact. The action I speak of on our last day on vacation was that Megan and Ellen were robbed. They were so busy trying to get their, by now, fifty pound suitcases (because of so many purchases,) and myself onto the train that they didn’t notice the young gypsy woman who appeared out of nowhere and helped herself to 50 euros from Ellen’s purse and a portfolio from Megan’s’ in which she had all of her travel documents (not her passport). I saw it all. I was saved. The gypsy girl was not taken with my obvious beauty. Fortunately, Ellen had copies of all the travel papers and Megan had some euros. The trip from Milan to S.F. though long was uneventful and now I am in Megan’s home. I am wondering if I will ever get out of my plastic enclosure because I ended up in Northern California and all the collapsible umbrellas in Megan’s collection get very little use. I am told it rarely rains in Northern California.
I must admit that I am awed by the persistence, determination, and fortitude of my owner. Megan is clearly worthy of my great beauty. She has made me feel special from the first day I met her. She chose me above all others even when having a perfectly acceptable alternative. When someone goes through so much trouble to ensure your safety isn’t that a wonderful thing.

Ellen Blaufarb is a Marriage Family Therapist. She is chair of the Benicia USD Bond Oversight Committee.

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