How many times have you faced a problem or a series of problems and once you mulled it over and considered all your options, your final best-guess decision to solve your problems would be to purchase a 1980s vintage-style cocktail-table arcade game?

Yeah, me neither. At least I didn’t have those sorts of problems for 60 years. Desires, yes, but problems, no. Most guys would accept an arcade game if it were given to them and they had room for it, and would do so with glee.

Paying for it is a different story. To shell out the cash for a commercial-grade arcade game is for special tastes and still involves major internal and marital struggles.

Granted, guys spend thousands on toys, but they are usually more mainstream choices, a Harley, a Bayliner, a Yamaha ATV, the store’s largest flatscreen, or even the elephant-in-the-room, all-time favorite man-toy, a pool table. A 1980s arcade game doesn’t fit into that core list.

I had special needs. Thus, I went out last weekend and bought me a cocktail table-sized, two-player arcade with free play and a working coin box that I can program to accept any coin or token, even plastic ones. It was exactly what I needed, like when you drive all the way to Raley’s or Safeway for cumin. It filled the bill.

It has 60 vintage games installed, including all the Pac-Mans, Donkey Kong, Space Invaders, Dig Dug, Frogger, 1943, Galaga, and so on, games from my youth when a milkshake and a pocket full of quarters was my two-legged stool of joy, needing only a joystick to hold me up and fulfill the holy trinity.

But, did I need it? Or did I just want it? Considering I’ve been pricing these things for a year and shuddering and closing the advertisements in haste at the price tags, I’d say I truly needed this machine.

Funny, this is the same explanation I gave my wife before she nodded and let me jump out of bed, chug my cooling coffee, and drive off to Santa Clara at the crack of dawn on Saturday. I was back before noon with my new toy strapped down in the back of my truck.

OK, here are my extremely valid reasons.

One: I am a grandfather with three grandsons. That alone should convince most readers of the necessity of having an arcade game in your man cave. We’ve always wanted the kind of house that would make our grandchildren beg to come visit, because we love them and don’t want to be lonely.

Two: I needed two items to improve the ambiance of my developing man cave. I needed better mood lighting. Currently, the main light source is two harshly bright ceiling lights with five bulbs each, a Zombie lightbox, and one lava lamp in the corner. I like candles, but they’re hard to use as daily lighting. I don’t have much room for another lamp.

I’ve been nagged but immobile at solving this lighting problem. Now, when I have on the lava lamp, the Zombie picture, the arcade game, and my Joker Poker Gottlieb pinball machine, the colorful mood lighting is perfect.

Three: I needed a coffee table. I’ve been using an antique steamer trunk. It’s a family heirloom of Susan’s, a nice old item and currently prone to spills and stains as a table. Besides, we can’t stick our feet under it, so sitting around it feels cramped. I priced nice coffee tables at a couple hundred bucks. Now I have a coffee table, a light source, and a time-killing gaming device all in one.

Four: I throw one big party a year, my annual Cinco de Mayo Traditional Mexican Luau Backyard Bull and BBQ Celebration of Spring and Launch into Summer Bash. It started nine years ago as a way to introduce Gino to my Benicia friends. It has grown since then. We have bins of decorations stacked in the garage.

I like to one-up myself each year with a new element, either new recipes, new cocktails, new lawn furniture, more rope lights, something. Last year, I added a pinball machine. It was a big hit. This year I’m including my arcade table. That should entertain many of my guests.

Five: When I throw any sort of party, I like to include children and adults. I’m a teacher. I like kids. More folks come when their kids are invited. However, once the party starts, it’s nice to send all the kids to one end of the house while the adults move to the other end. My downstairs game room should prove to be an even more effective Mecca for children come May.

The kids want me to get a flatscreen and a PS4 or Xbox. Sorry, kids, that’s not my era or my style yet. Maybe after retirement.

Six: South Lake Tahoe. We have our family cabin in Tahoe and we run into the same problem — bring the kids, have fun, but in the evenings when adults want to imbibe and play Cards Against Humanity, we need the children to go upstairs. There has been little motivation for them to do so. Upstairs has only beds and a bathroom. Once I tire of this arcade console at home, I plan to take it to Tahoe and put it upstairs.

Seven: Our cabin is also available for rent. It’s how we subsidize the bills. Having an arcade table in the children’s bedroom will be an appealing amenity for drawing in more potential customers. I’ve seen this table online here: Arcadeclassics = $1,999; Dreamarcades = $2,099; Coinopstore = $1,395; Amazon = $1,398; eBay = $1,450.

When I found a guy in Santa Clara at Billiardwholesale.net who works with a fellow who builds them — the motherboard for this arcade retails for $39 — and then sells them out the door for $995, I put my pants on and drove down there.

Steve Gibbs teaches at Benicia High School and has written a column for The Herald since 1985.