WHEN FORCES OF NATURE APPEAR IN OUR DREAMS, they make perfect metaphors for emotionally laden experiences in our waking lives. Sunshine and light breezes might reflect easy going in the near future, but tornadoes and floods are another matter. Consider today’s powerful example:
Dear Carolyn,
I am planning to go to my 10-year high school reunion this summer. All of this has brought up memories of my old boyfriend, “Ed.” Actually, I have thought of Ed many times over the years. These memories always make me mad. He dumped me multiple times. I was the fool who always went back. I can’t believe I was so stupid!
He didn’t respect me. He used me and I felt like crap when I was with him. Still, I participated in the “relationship,” even sought him out! So, these angry memories are as much my fault as his. Even now, ten years later, I just don’t get it. What was the attraction?
All this has me wondering if I should even go to the reunion. What will I say if I see Ed? I’m afraid that I will feel like a fool all over again and that he will be secretly laughing at me, if he’s not laughing out loud!
Last night after stewing about all this again, I dreamed I was on a hill observing a storm front approaching. I could clearly see a warm air mass on one side and a cold front on the other. They race down into a valley, run into each other, twist around and create a tornado, wreak havoc, then separate and disappear. Behind them it looked like a dam broke and the water came rushing toward me. I was glad to be high up on the hillside, but still felt afraid of the rushing waters.
Signed, Reunion Blues
Dear Reunion,
Of all weather phenomena, tornadoes are among the most violent and destructive. And what are they made of? Two elements — a warm front and a cold front — drawn together, spinning wildly around each other, causing destruction and then splitting apart. Does that ring a bell? Consider the hot-and-cold relationship you described between you and Ed.
Your dream uses this powerful metaphor to demonstrate for you now — from your higher perspective on the hillside, removed by ten years — that like those forces of nature, you were drawn to Ed and he was drawn to you. When the two of you collided, it caused havoc and lasting emotional damage. And in the end, perhaps most painful of all, there just wasn’t anything to it. Maybe that realization is what brings the flood of emotion.
It seems that for all these years, you have not only been angry with Ed, but very unforgiving of yourself. You were a teenage girl, Dear Dreamer. Maybe you had to repeat a hard lesson more times than you’d like to admit, but you’re not still repeating it, are you? Find a way to let it go and enjoy a reunion with your true friends.
Sweet Dreams to you!
Carolyn Plath, M.Ed., is a Benicia resident and member of the International Association for the Study of Dreams. Reach her at sendmeyourdreams@yahoo.com.
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