THIS IS ONE OF THOSE TIME-WARP STORIES where I speak of a future event that will be over when you read about it. Susan and I threw a double retirement party for ourselves on Saturday, May 9 at the house. Currently it’s still three days away. I wonder how it went? It was a midday backyard barbecue affair and I can only hope the weather was kind and all had fun. Weather report shows temperatures in the low 70s. Yoiks!

We tacked the retirement angle onto an already-existing annual spring shindig we’ve hosted for 10 years, so the two parties combined should be big.

This is the 10th anniversary of our annual Cinco de Mayo Mexican Luau Spring Celebration Party. We added the luau moniker to what was intended to be a traditional Cinco de Mayo party 10 years ago only because Party City USA was short on Cinco de Mayo decorations and we had to go to the Hawaiian aisle and add grass skirts, tiki toys, and pineapples to our basket. We’re still using some of those ancient decorations with their thousand staple holes.

One guest years ago stitched me a personalized apron that reads “Mexican Luau” and shows men in sombreros celebrating under palm trees. I wear it every year.

That first party began as a way to showcase Gino’s remodeling skills and find him jobs. He was new to California. After seeing the upgrades he’d made to our house and patio during that party, teacher Sara Woo hired Gino to fix a few things at her house. Ten years later, he’s still working for Sara. She called yesterday to see if he has flown in for the party yet.

Gino has found a decade of work since that first 2006 Luau and still flies in twice a year from Philadelphia to remodel bathrooms and such. He hasn’t missed a Luau in ten years, and I’m going to pick him up at the Oakland Airport today, Wednesday, in 20 minutes. I’m trying to finish this column before we go.

Looking back, Susan and I have thrown a lot of parties over the years. We like parties. To assure good attendance, we learned not to simply schedule them to go with existing holidays. Many people already have plans for existing holidays and cannot come.

We invent names and excuses for off-calendar events, and then send out the invitations. We’ve had a Winter Solstice Party with hot drinks only, parties centered around wine tasting, micro-distillery vodka tasting, craft beer sampling, fried-chicken batter tasting, homemade corn dog tasting, dry-aged versus smoked steak tasting, our annual Friday Mexican Luau Decoration Pre-Party in the garage where we get goofy and then decorate the property, and our annual Sunday After Mexican Luau Finish-Off-the-Leftovers Party.

We decided that the best parties are the ones that repeat every year. Annual events build an identity, a following, and allow friends time to anticipate. Annual parties help more and more people make room in their Schedule of Fun for your event. That’s how our Luau came about.

Each year we try to add something new. Usually it’s a new menu item. Gino has cooked through the seafood kingdom. We’ve done fried chicken, homemade corn dogs, and chili of all meat sources. I built a man cave and added pinball machines a few years ago. That added a lot of fun and gave us a game room when the weather turned sour.

This year the new addition is my backyard Gstackspits Vallejo-welded king-of-the-hill offset smoker. I have six racks of ribs waiting in the garage deepfreeze. I made up a sack of homemade rub yesterday. I also bought big bags of lima beans and several ham hocks. Instead of chili this year, we’ll have comfort soup. It will leave guests a finely scented reminder of our party for days afterward.

In the early years, we required RSVPs so we could make enough food and buy enough beverages. However, I know there is ambivalence around responding to an RSVP request. When I get them myself, I’m hesitant to commit because I might change my mind when the day comes and not show up, so often I don’t RSVP, then I want to go, but I don’t because I feel like a party crasher. Do you feel like that about RSVPs, too?

We came upon a new idea that has worked well. Those first few years our party was costing us around $1,000 all told for grub and grog, and we relied heavily on RSVP lists to avoid waste or shortages.

Then with the help of our guests we came up with a new system that has saved us money and increased our attendance. Our invitations now ask each guest to bring a sampling of their favorite beverage and favorite food dish. Thus our cooler and banquet table are always full regardless of how many people show up, and no RSVP is necessary.

OK, I didn’t finish in time. Gino is here and it’s Thursday morning. The party is Saturday and he wants to install a new hardwood floor in my den before then. He’s a crazy man. He was up at 5:30 a.m. examining my tool collection and stacking wood. I will teach my day and rush home to help. Friday will be all about food preparation and yard decoration.

Wish us luck. Wish you all could be there. Hey, we’re retiring! Yippee!

Steve Gibbs teaches at Benicia High School and has written a column for The Herald since 1985.

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